What else happened in my rut

Celebrating Rosh Hashana as a community. So sweet being
able to share my traditions with my family on the mountain.

A few blog posts ago, I talked about how I kind of got into a routine and lost the clarity of understanding why I am here putting up with the same 12 people day after day.
Now I am in a much better place. I am tackling that Judgment part of my ENTJ and working towards a fresh new year as we are between the Jewish holidays, Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur.

I will say, living at AMI with the same 12 people kind of reminds me how much I take for granted having a larger community. In every setting I've been in, if a friendship or relationship does not work out, I could always just move onto the next one.

Now I can't just switch people. I actually have to face challenges as they come up or just be ok with things not always being fair.  Here are 5 things that seem so obvious but have been so challenging.

1. Life isn't fair. So you think, since there are only 12 people where we are, that's small enough that chores and tasks can be divvied out evenly. Well they never are, and some people will often carry more weight than others depending on their personality and what they can handle. I am working on trying to make things fair when possible and trying to make sure I am not overextending myself in the process. At the same time, it also really easy to see how much work you are putting in yourself, whereas its much harder to see that same thing in others.

2. Talking about people behind their backs is rarely the answer. Grayson listens to me complain about how peeved I am at what happens during the day. Sometimes it was nice to know I am not alone in thinking something was offensive, but most of the time complaining can exacerbate the problem. I think that it is only worth talking about someone behind their back, if it helps you formulate a way to make things better in person. And sometimes when you are able to formulate a way to make things better, not only does your relationship become stronger, but you do as well.

The grapes and flowers were grown here.
The honey was harvested by our bees.
Doing things yourself is so sweet sometimes.

3. To an extent, specialization is awesome. Growing all your own food, tools, and materials seems nearly impossible to me. Because the way humans got to be as cool as they did, is they realized how to maximize time through trading goods and services. For example, walnuts are amazing! You can buy organic local ones for a few dollars a pound even though if you were to do it by hand it would take hours and hours!

4. To an extent, doing things yourself is awesome. Even though it is way more efficient to buy blackberry jam, there is nothing more satisfying then growing or foraging the berries, picking them, jamming them, and then canning them yourself. It also tastes way better that way and you can know the source well. The only problem is, time is so valuable and the joy of self-sufficiency can be drained by the effort it can take at times.

5. Community created socialism can probably work in a small scale. We have heard and seen many stories of intentional community success stories and stories of hardships. I am also partially living in that type of environment and I can see the benefits. I'd be curious to know of what others feel on this subject though.

I hope you enjoyed a little piece into my brain in this crazy community I am living, learning, and loving.